The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I hate today
21:34 Oct 31 2007
Times Read: 856

I was supposed to go out with some friends tonight so that I can actually make friends in this place instead of always being with my boyfriend. And then he can't find a way to the bank so I don't have any money so I'm not going anywhere tonight.



I have a costume and can't go anywhere.



Its just like the last few years. No Halloween for me.

Halloween
15:43 Oct 31 2007
Times Read: 857

Well today is my favorite day of the year. Not because of the darkness that surrounds it, or the history behind it. But because of the free candy.^_^



Tonight will be my first time to a club and I'm looking forward to it. I'm going with some friends and I hope that I won't get hit on too much. I'm not going with the boyfriend and I'm wearing a very sexy outfit.



*prays for decent music*

Found on someone pro
05:03 Oct 31 2007
Times Read: 857






I went to this site and saw a few things that pertain to my career as a model.





I'm so glad I turned down the offer to be a Suicide Girl

Correction to the GH3 list
21:36 Oct 30 2007
Times Read: 859

1. Starting Out Small



* "Slow Ride" – Foghat

* "Talk Dirty to Me" – Poison

* "Hit Me with Your Best Shot" – Pat Benatar

* "Story of My Life" – Social Distortion

* "Rock and Roll All Nite" – Kiss (Encore)





2. Your First Real Gig



* "Mississippi Queen" – Mountain

* "School's Out" – Alice Cooper

* "Sunshine of Your Love" – Cream

* "Barracuda" – Heart

* "Guitar Battle vs. Tom Morello"

* "Bulls on Parade" – Rage Against the Machine (Encore)





3. Making the Video



* "When You Were Young" – The Killers

* "Miss Murder" – AFI

* "The Seeker" – The Who

* "Lay Down" – Priestess

* "Paint It, Black" – The Rolling Stones (Encore)





4. European Invasion



* "Paranoid" – Black Sabbath

* "Anarchy in the U.K." – Sex Pistols

* "Kool Thing" – Sonic Youth

* "My Name Is Jonas" – Weezer

* "Even Flow" – Pearl Jam (Encore)





5. Bighouse Blues



* "Holiday In Cambodia" – Dead Kennedys

* "Rock You Like a Hurricane" – Scorpions

* "Same Old Song and Dance" – Aerosmith

* "La Grange" – ZZ Top

* "Guitar Battle vs. Slash "

* "Welcome to the Jungle" – Guns N' Roses (Encore)





6. The Hottest Band on Earth



* "Black Magic Woman" – Santana

* "Cherub Rock" – The Smashing Pumpkins

* "Black Sunshine" – White Zombie

* "The Metal" – Tenacious D

* "Pride and Joy" – Stevie Ray Vaughan (Encore)





7. Live in Japan



* "Before I Forget" – Slipknot

* "Stricken" – Disturbed

* "3's & 7's" – Queens of the Stone Age

* "Knights of Cydonia" – Muse

* "Cult of Personality" – Living Colour (Encore)





8. Battle For Your Soul



* "Raining Blood" - Slayer

* "Cliffs of Dover" – Eric Johnson

* "The Number of the Beast" – Iron Maiden

* "One" – Metallica

* "Guitar Battle vs. Lou" (The Devil Went Down to Georgia –

Charlie Daniels Band [guitar cover])



Bonus tracks (Press the Blue Fret to go to 'em)



* "Avalancha" – Héroes del Silencio

* "Can't Be Saved" – Senses Fail

* "Closer" – Lacuna Coil

* "Don't Hold Back" – The Sleeping

* "Down 'N Dirty" – LA Slum Lords

* "F.C.P.R.E.M.I.X." – The Fall of Troy

* "Generation Rock" – Revolverheld

* "Go That Far" – Bret Michaels Band

* "Hier Kommt Alex" – Die Toten Hosen

* "I'm in the Band" – The Hellacopters

* "Impulse" - An Endless Sporadic

* "In the Belly of a Shark" – Gallows

* "In Love" – Scouts of St. Sebastian

* "Mauvais Garçon" – Naast

* "Metal Heavy Lady" – Lions

* "Minus Celsius" – Backyard Babies

* "My Curse" – Killswitch Engage

* "Nothing for Me Here" – Dope

* "Prayer of the Refugee" – Rise Against

* "Radio Song" – Superbus

* "Ruby" – Kaiser Chiefs

* "She Bangs the Drums" – The Stone Roses

* "Take This Life" – In Flames

* "The Way It Ends" – Prototype

* "Through The Fire And Flames" – DragonForce

(Beat Lou to unlock on any difficulty)

^_^
21:30 Oct 30 2007
Times Read: 861






I should have some more when I actually find them

Song List for GH3
19:40 Oct 29 2007
Times Read: 863

Tier 1:

Smooth - Santana

Dammit - Blink 182

Danger! High Voltage - Electric Six

I Wanna Rock - Twisted Sister

Turn Up The Radio - Autograph



Tier 2:

The Final Countdown - Europe

In My Head - Queens Of The Stone Age

Owner Of A Lonely Heart - Yes

What's The Matter - Rollins Band

What We're All About - Sum 41



Tier 3:

Guerilla Radio - Rage Against The Machine

Pretend That We're Dead - L7

Oya Como Va - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Need Your Loving Tonight - Queen

Smooth Criminal - Alien Ant Farm



Tier 4:

You Aint Seen Nothin Yet - Bachman Turner Overdrive (BTO)

Links 2,3,4 - Rammstein

Strangler - Soilwork

Bottom Of A Bottle - Smile Empty Soul

Are You Gonna Be My Girl - Jet



Tier 5:

96 Quite Bitter Beings - CKY

Right Side OF The Bed - Atreyu

Little Sister - Stevie Ray Vaughn

Four Words To Choke Apon - Bullet For My Valentine

Run To You - Bryan Adams



Tier 6:

Voodoo Child - Jimi Hendrix

La Grange - ZZ Top

The Memory Remains - Metallica

Hotel California - The Eagles

Radio/Video - System Of A Down



Tier 7:

Eruption - Van Halen

Be Yourself - Audioslave

Rose of Sharyn - Killswitch Engage

Crazy Train - Ozzy Osbourne

This Lying World - Unearth



Tier 8:

Needled 24/7 - Children Of Bodom

Layla - Eric Clapton

Angel Of Death - Slayer

Stairway To Heaven - Led Zeppelin

Holy Wars - Megadeth



Tier 9:

Thunderstruck - AC/DC

Number Of The Beast - Iron Maiden

Highway Star - Deep Purple

Bat Country - Avenged Sevenfold

Cemetary Gates - Pantera



Tier 10:

Hourglass - Lamb Of God

A Gunshot To The Head Of Trepidation - Trivium

Through The Fire and Flames - Dragonforce

Man Made God - In Flames

Battle Against Time - Wintersun





Unlockables:

Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Steve Vai feat. Yngwie Malmsteen

Black Sheep - Sonata Arctica

The Audience Is Listening - Steve Vai

Satch Boogie - Joe Satriani

Keep On Rocking In The Free World - G3

Jump Man - Buckethead

Excessive Force - Battalion

Sails of Charon - Scropions

Over
07:39 Oct 29 2007
Times Read: 864

Today was our last day doing Howl O Scream. It was a great thing and I can't wait for next year. I made some good friends and think I have found some people that I will be friends with for some time now.



I just hope to find a new job ASAP

Depression
17:47 Oct 26 2007
Times Read: 865

I really need to fix this. I'm getting more like a hermit each day.



And the fact that after Sunday we might not be able to pay the rent and bills so he will get to go back to his parents and I will be homeless.....



If that isn't enough to make someone depressed I don't know what is.

Face to Face
07:57 Oct 26 2007
Times Read: 867






Don't tell me now with a smile on your face

That you're lost...down and out

When there was nothing left in me



You can't stop fuckin' with my head

Stop fuckin' with my head

My silence you break

The smile that you fake (you fake)



[Chorus:]

There's not one thing that you can say to make it right

Unless you say "I'm leavin"

And if you're not...then please tell me why

Please tell me why you can't



Save face

Say it to my face



Can I take all the filth in your head

All the words that you said (that you said)

And throw it away (throw it out)



You can't stop fuckin' with my head

Stop fuckin' with my head

My silence you break

The smile that you take away



[Chorus:]

There's not one thing that you can say to make it right

Unless you say "I'm leavin"

And if you're not...then please tell me why

Please tell me why you can't



That shit you're talkin' don't mean nothing to me anymore

Limp dick...you fuck stick...let's settle the score

Run and hide you know I'll find you anywhere

Motherfucker...two faced prick with hell to pay

What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again

Swing batter-batter, swing batter-batter, swing...

What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again

Swing batter-batter...fucked me for the last time!



Just take a swing...

C'mon...you should've taken that swing...

Just take your swing...



[Chorus:]

There's not one thing that you can say to make it right

Unless you say "I'm leavin"

And if you're not...then please tell me why

Please tell me why you can't



Swing...just take your swing...fuck you!



Just take your swing...

You can't stop fuckin' with my head

Stop fuckin' with my head

---

Every time I hear this song I think back to how bad I was treated in middle/high school and I wish I could just tell those asshats to fuck off. It took me a lot of therapy to get through things and its my time now.

New Serj Video
18:49 Oct 25 2007
Times Read: 871

Andrew
18:17 Oct 25 2007
Times Read: 872

For the last few weeks every time I talk to him it seems like he only wants to get back with me. I keep telling him no and every time he asks me if everything is going ok with me and my boyfriend. I keep telling him that he needs to leave me alone, but the dumbass can't seem to realize I'm through with him like that. 3 years of the abuse and drugs was enough. I moved on and just wanted to be friends. This isn't the old days when I will go back to him at a whim.



I am happy for once in my life and its not because of him.



(and one of our songs happens to come on when typing this)





*shoots music*

07:42 Oct 25 2007
Times Read: 873

PRIVATE ENTRY
18:34 Oct 23 2007
Times Read: 878


• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •

Rant
18:32 Oct 23 2007
Times Read: 879

I wake up to the phone ringing and when I answer it no one replies to me.



Then when I go to the bathroom I find out the water is turned off.

PRIVATE ENTRY
17:54 Oct 21 2007
Times Read: 882


• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •

Work Sucks
09:04 Oct 21 2007
Times Read: 885

So tonight I got hit during the first set.



I was uber pissed. Then during a few of the sets funny shit started to happen. I saw old friends, got a quarter thrown at me, and someone asked me to marry them. Oh and someone handed me a full yard beer through my window.



Above all that I was having one of my depression moods.



One thing cheered me up. I saw this 10-12 year old kid wearing an old school System of a Down shirt. I broke character and told him that he was awesome.

Elect the Dead
08:14 Oct 20 2007
Times Read: 886






I have it !!!!!!!!!!







its amazing

Ouch
01:31 Oct 18 2007
Times Read: 888

I would think that 5 shots are a bit much. I was only expecting 2 shots at the most...







My arms are sore

It just doesn't make sense to me
04:36 Oct 16 2007
Times Read: 892

Why does someone say that they will be there for thir friends and when you are there for them they love it, but when you need them, they are no where to be found.





On another note, Brittany called me today. She is doing good I guess. She has a b/f now and is trying to stay clean.

I wonder...
19:26 Oct 14 2007
Times Read: 894

Is life supposed to be so boring in the afternoon. Or is it only fun at night?

Sexy
17:26 Oct 13 2007
Times Read: 895










That is why I love my job.



I work with sexy guys like that.





Now that I think about it I live with him too.

HOS Hell
06:54 Oct 12 2007
Times Read: 898

I hate work. I love scaring the shit out of people. But I hate getting the shit beaten out of me for doing my job.



I swear I'm going to crack an idiots skull for hitting me.

My Take on Music
08:47 Oct 09 2007
Times Read: 906

Music has always spoken to me. Its not the words in the song, its the art that the different sounds make together that gets me. A lot of people don't like a song or a band because the singer sucks or the lyrics to the song are stupid. I look past that.



For me the music has to actually tell a story without the words. Then the words need to clarify it. The best example I can think of right now is Three Nil by Slipknot. The words are a bit harsh, but if you take the words out and just listen to the music you can hear what I mean. When I hear the bridge all I can think of is some pissed off women taking back what is hers.



I have always seen music in colors and this is why I love it so much. It is the purest form of art out there. Even rap is art. Each type of music is a different type of art. Techno is like abstract art, classical is like classical art(wow that was bad), Rock/Metal is like the Gothic style of art (and I actually mean the Gothic era, not the modern take on that word), country is the art that expresses family, rap is the graffiti art out there now, and pop is the happy stuff.



When I first hear a song I close my eyes and let the music make art around me. If it makes crappy art then its crappy music.



hmm more to come later when i'm more adept at thinking

-.-
06:47 Oct 09 2007
Times Read: 910

Apparently the TV is more important than me....





*kills the tv*

PRIVATE ENTRY
12:12 Oct 08 2007
Times Read: 913


• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •

Goth Love
23:59 Oct 07 2007
Times Read: 916




Sitting in the corner



As the black tears



Keep hitting the sill



Only to be mixed with



The deep red blood



Dripping from her wrist.







Laying next to her



Is the knife that she used



As she sees her reflection



The black lipstick is smeared



And the gauges in her ear







Looking at herself



Pain is all she sees



A pain without any love



No one ever seems to care



If she decides todie



Today or tomorrow.







Standing in the doorway



Is the boy of her dreams



Here to kiss away the black tears



And here to hold her



Until death does she part.

Brittany
19:20 Oct 06 2007
Times Read: 926

A few months back, I was really close to this girl named Brittany. Her and I met a long time ago when we both doing meth together. Then we saw each other again when we were in rehab together. When we both got out we got really close and whatnot. The one thing I told her was that if she started to use again I wouldn't talk to her again.



About 3 months ago she called me to tell me that she failed her drug test for meth and wouldn't be able to come see me because of that.



I told her good-bye and haven't really talked to her since then.



Today I called her and didn't get in touch with her, but talked to her grandmother and gave her my new number. I hope she calls me because I'm worried and I really want to talk to her.



*listening to 3 Libras-A Perfect Circle*

I wanna go...*cries*
07:17 Oct 06 2007
Times Read: 927

The music videos for ALL 12 songs off of my up coming album "Elect The Dead" will be playing at the following location on October 22nd. The times have to be determined so keep checking back for updates.



Herricks Cinema

3324 Hillside Avenue

New Hyde Park, NY



Parsippany Cinema

3165 RT 46

Parsippany, NJ



The Magnolia

3699 McKinney Avenue

Dallas, TX



Embarcadero Center Cinema

1 Embarcadero Center Promenade Level

San Francisco, CA



Ultrastar Theatres Mission Valley

7510 Hazard Center Drive

San Diego, CA



Kendall Square Cinema

One Kendall Sq Bldg. 1900

Cambridge, MA



Century Centre Cinema

2828 N. Clark Street

Chicago, IL



Emagine Novi

44425 W. 12 Mile Road

Novi, MI



Clearviews Anthony Wayne Cinema

109 W. Lancaster Avenue

Wayne, PA



Metro Cinemas

911 N.E. 50th Street

Seattle, WA



The River Oaks

2009 West Gray

Houston, TX



Lagoon Cinema

1320 Lagoon Avenue

Minneapolis, MN



Harkins Tempe Marketplace

2000 E. Rio Salado Parkway

Tempe, AZ

Kids
22:57 Oct 04 2007
Times Read: 929

For the last few days all I have been thinking about is how bad I want to have kids. I don't think I'm able to and I so desperately want to try. The problem is my boyfriend wants to wait and I don't feel like waiting. I want to have them now, before its too late. I know I should really rethink this, but I want them so bad its making me depressed.

Woot finally the banners
05:09 Oct 04 2007
Times Read: 930

SG and the stupid girls thinking they are hot
21:28 Oct 03 2007
Times Read: 937

Ok there are many girls out there that are what are called "Suicide Girls Hopefuls" What these girls don't realize is, if they are actually looking into being a model they will never get anywhere after being called a Suicide Girl. The modeling industry looks down on these girls. Try actually modeling something instead of just stripping for the camera. You are nothing more than porn.



Many may question where I get off saying this and I will state this simply. I am a model. I do fetish and bondage modeling. I don't do it to make others jealous. I do it to make me feel better. I used to have low self-esteem and it took a special someone to help me get over that. I love bondage because it is a very intricate art form and I find it beautiful. Heres the funny thing. I also model other things. That is the wonderful part about being freelance. If I want to do a normal outdoor shoot I'm free to do so. Yes my portfolio has mostly pics of me done professionally, but I also have a few personal pics up as well. That, and anything that is photoshopped was taken by me, and is of me. (yay for a cameraphone)



I figured I have seen so many SG hopefuls around here I want to send this message out.



Suicide Girls=Porn



You can argue it all day, but artistic nudity doesn't show anything.